


You're the (Spider)man for me

by scalira



Category: Shadowhunters
Genre: Fluff, M/M, but i saw a Spiderman gifset and thought it was Simon for a sec, i know very little about Spiderman and Deadpool in general, implied bottom!raphael (as it should be), simon looks like spiderman, so here you go, spideypool references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-06-04 22:16:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6677506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scalira/pseuds/scalira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Huh," Raphael breathes.<br/>"You kinda look like Peter Parker."</p>
            </blockquote>





	You're the (Spider)man for me

**Author's Note:**

> Idk what this is I've just been playing with this idea for a while and wanted to write something like this. I might delete later but for now I hope you somewhat enjoy this

Raphael hates to admit it, but the fledgling has some kind of influence on him.

It’s not like he suddenly turned in a pop culture expert, staying up all night (day) to watch cartoons meant for children with oddly adult themes or reading comics until his head spun. But Simon managed to rub off at least _some_ of his interests on him.

Raphael doesn’t even notice until Simon shows up in front of him, wearing his old glasses.

Instead of questioning him about the unnecessary accessory on the bridge of his nose, he just tilts his head and huffs.

“Huh,” Raphael breathes.

“You kinda look like Peter Parker.”

Simon beams at him, full of teeth and wrinkles around his eyes.

“Tobey Maguire’s Peter Parker or Andrew Garfield’s Peter Parker?”

Raphael eyes him up and down, lingering on the hoodie peeking underneath his brown jacket.

“Definitely Andrew Garfield’s,” he decides.

“Nice!” Simon cheers.

“If I’m Spiderman, you have to be Deadpool.”

Raphael frowns.

“Who’s Deadpool?” He questions. Simon’s jaw drops like it does sometimes, way too dramatic for the situation they’re in. Then he shakes his head.

“You wouldn’t understand,” he dismisses with a gesture of his hand, “he’s only in the comics. Well, actually, they’re releasing a Deadpool movie soon we’re definitely gonna watch together even if I have to strap you to a chair, but for now, dear ol’ Wade Wilson only lives on paper.”

Raphael glares at him, finding himself annoyed at himself for not knowing this Deadpool guy. Instead of expressing this annoyance, he just tries to put as much irritation in his next question as he can.

“Why are you wearing your glasses anyway? You don’t need them.”

“I know,” Simon shrugs, bringing up a hand to tap on his glasses.

“It’s window glass. I’m allergic – well, I _was_ allergic to contact lenses and I’m visiting my mom so I gotta wear the glasses to keep up appearances.”

“You’re meeting your mom at this time a day? It’s 10 at night.”

“We’re going for a late night snack!” Simon explains.

“I told her I have a very busy schedule and that’s the only time I’m available. We’re probably gonna eat some tacos from a sketchy food truck.”

“You know you can’t actually eat anything, right?” Raphael reminds him with raised eyebrows. The other boy rolls his eyes at him.

“Duh, no need to remind me I can’t enjoy basic human rights like pasta anymore. Don’t worry, I’ll just pretend.”

“Okay, Spiderman. Be home before sunrise.”

Simon smiles again, a grin that makes Raphael miss the sun just a tad less.

“I like that nickname way better than baby.”

“Do you now? Well, _baby_ , better get going now. Don’t want to keep momma waiting.”

Simon flips him off before disappearing out of the room, Raphael’s laughter chasing him through the front doors of the hotel.

**~~**

Okay, so. Raphael really doesn’t have any good excuse as to why he’s standing in a 24/7 comic book store (why do these things even _exist_? Don’t nerds need sleep too? Are they more powerful than normal Mundanes? Are they more evolved? What’s up with this?) flipping through the Deadpool section.

He’s getting slightly frustrated and overwhelmed by the amount of comics in this section. He doesn’t even know where to start.

Luckily, the teenage boy standing behind the corner notices his distress and strides over to him, jeans too loose for his skinny hips and face covered in pimples.

“Can I help you?” He asks rather bored. Honestly, Raphael would be bored too if he would have to be in a comic store at 1am.

“Yes, actually,” Raphael replies politely. The boy perks up when he hears his voice – something that happens quite a lot with people. Raphael just has that effect on them, Mundanes and Downworlders alike.

“I want to buy all the Deadpool comics involving Spiderman.”

The boy quirks an eyebrow at him, seeming surprised.

“Uh – okay,” he eventually says, moving past Raphael to flip through the various comics and picking one out every few flips. He ends up with a small pile and hands it to Raphael.

“There,” he says, nodding to the comic books.

“I think that’s all. Anything else?”

“No,” Raphael shakes his head.

“That would be all.”

“Okay, come on then,” the boy motions him over to the counter so he can pay for the comics.

“That’ll be $35.87, please.”

**~~**

“Spiderman and Deadpool are lovers,” Raphael blurts out three days later. They had just been sitting around, both busy with their own stuff. Raphael had been thinking about it a lot, replaying the conversation they’d had in his head over and over again. _If I’m Spiderman, you have to be Deadpool._

Simon shoots him an impressed look.

“You’re probably the first straight guy who admits that instead of insisting they’re just ‘bros’.”

Raphael makes an offended noise at the back of his throat, throwing the thick book he’d been reading into Simon’s direction but purposely missing.

“I can’t believe you think I’m straight!” He complains.

Simon’s eyes turn wide as he sits up straight, his laptop forgotten and almost slipping off his lap as he sits.

“Wait – you’re not?”

“No! You actually offended me quite a lot, Lewis. Do I look straight to you?”

Simon eyes him up and down, a light blush spreading across his cheeks.

“I don’t know – I – I guess not,” he stutters. Then he composes himself, clears his throat.

“But anyway, yeah. Spiderman and Deadpool are totally doing each other.”

Raphael raises an eyebrow.

“So, the other day, when you asked me to be the Deadpool to your Spiderman – you asked me to do you?”

Simon visibly gulps, his eyes darting from Raphael’s eyes to his mouth and up again, absentmindedly licking his own lips.

“Maybe _I_ want to do _you_ ,” he replies weakly. Raphael chuckles.

“Well, maybe I’d let you,” he grins. Simon turns even more red.

“Really?”

“Yeah,” he shrugs casually. Then he gets up and pats Simon’s head as he passes him.

“Unfortunately, I – as a certified gay man – know for a fact that Spiderman would be the bottom in the relationship. And since I don’t top… I can’t possibly be your Deadpool.”

“I could be Deadpool,” Simon blurts bluntly.

“Sorry, no can do, _baby_. You don’t resemble him at all. Guess we’ll have to let go off the idea of doing each other,” Raphael smirks smugly. Simon makes a small noise at the back of his throat, but then turns back to his laptop, his cheeks still blazing.

“Whatever,” he mutters as if he doesn’t care.

“I’m actually not even a fan of Deadpool.”

“Sure you aren’t,” Raphael nods. Before Simon can say anything else, he walks out of the room.

**~~**

There’s a lot more flirting after that. Raphael would occasionally call Simon Spiderman, to which Simon would eye him up and down and say he isn’t a bottom. Raphael would shrug, tell him he couldn’t pull of being Deadpool and even boldly run his fingers over Simon’s chest before walking away. He’s _always_ the one walking away, making sure Simon chases after him, even if it’s just for a step.

They’re in Simon’s room one night, Simon lying on his stomach on his bed and Raphael sitting on the floor at the end of it, his back resting against the mattress.

“I’ve been thinking,” Simon says.

“Don’t hurt yourself,” Raphael replies automatically. Simon gives him his best unimpressed fake laugh before continuing.

“So you’ve made it clear that you in no way want to be a top, right?”

“Right,” Raphael nods, loudly turning the page of the magazine he’s reading to show his disinterest in this conversation.

“And you said Spiderman is a bottom, right?”

“Is this going anywhere?” Raphael wonders.

“It is. So, Peter Parker would be a bottom in the Spideypool relationship. But what about his relationship with Gwen Stacy?”

“I don’t know, I don’t care about straight relationships.”

Simon peeks his head over the edge, angling his face in front of Raphael’s by pulling himself over the edge and partly resting his chest on the top of Raphael’s head.

“Well, it’s not a straight relationship if Peter is bisexual,” Simon reminds him, his breath tickling Raphael’s cheeks.

“Anyway, if you ask me, I’d say he’d totally top in that relationship.”

“Unless Gwen wants to ride him. Or peg him.”

“Will you just shut up for one second?” Simon growls. Raphael giggles.

“Okay, sorry! Go on, mighty expert.”

“As I was saying. If you don’t want to be the Deadpool to my Spiderman because of the whole sex position thing – maybe you can be my Gwen Stacy.”

And before Raphael can say anything else, he presses their lips together in some kind of parody of the upside down Spiderman kiss. It feels different kissing someone like this. Not weird – just… different. Instead of bumping noses, Raphael’s nose now brushes against Simon’s chin. It’s disorientating, but kinda nice.

When Simon pulls back, Raphael disapprovingly tuts at him.

“There isn’t an upside down Spiderman kiss in the Amazing Spiderman movies,” he says.

“I can’t believe you don’t know that. You’re such a fake fan.”

“Fine, then I’m Tobey’s Spiderman after all and you can be Mary Jane Watson.”

Raphael lifts his hand, weaves his fingers through Simon’s hair. He moves forward to peck him on the lips again.

“No, absolutely not. I don’t want to have anything to do with Tobey’s Spiderman.”

“I turned you in a total nerd snob,” Simon complains halfheartedly.

Raphael huffs.

“Tell you what,” he murmurs against Simon’s lips.

“I’ll change my opinion on the top/bottom dynamics in the Spideypool relationships if you give me a real Spiderman kiss, hanging from a rope during training tomorrow.”

Simon smiles, brushes their noses together.

“Does that mean I get to do you?” He asks cheekily.

“It means,” Raphael breathes against his lips, “I’ll be the Deadpool to your Spiderman.”

“Sweet!” Simon grins, and then he kisses him again.


End file.
